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Yakin...... |
D,
Hari dah pagi, aku dah tak takut lagi. Tak moh sambung citer seram tuh!!! Pagi ini, aku terpinga-pinga. Bagaimana aku lalui perjalanan hidupku? Ramai yg bertanya, aku tidak punya jawapannya. Aku imbas kembali, aku yakin Allah menerima doa ku. Even though I don't exactly get what I want, it was enough for me...just what I need. Once in a while, Allah gives me bonus. Teringat soalan ustz Haslinda, "awak rasa awak ni orang yg dirahmati Allah, orang soleha?"...something like that. Kiah jawap, "Insyaallah". Ustz Haslinda dgn tegas jawap, "YES! Awaklah orang yg dirahmati Allah." The thing is, kita mesti yakin akan perkara baik yg kita lakukan. Kita mesti yakin dgn Allah. Di sinilah kelemahan kita kadang-kala, no self confidence.
Lama-kelamaan, aku bertambah yakin. Allah mendengar segala keluhanku, segala doaku & Allah akan kabulkan. Seperti yg telah lalu, sudah terlalu banyak Allah kabulkan permintaanku. Kadang-kala tanpa disangka-sangka. Namun apabila kepiluan melanda, aku buntu.....menangis, meraung keseorangan...boleh camtu? Communicate with Allah in this manner? Yeah, I did just that. But soon after, I calmed down. Terlalu tenang.
Bila sudah tenang, orang shoot dgn arrow pun tak lut. Bila dah kena berus dgn therapy rohani melalui kuliah, semuanya kacang....no problemo. Sampai Kiah tanya, "asal ko, baik semacam? aku tembak dgn api pun tak kena!" Aku, "ko mesti faham, aku baru balik belajar, dah kena berus sampai kilat." Kiah, "hm..brapa lama ko ley tahan jadi baik?"......Hai, ley gitu...Nasib baik aku faham dia acah aku.
So, bagi yg gundah-gulana tu....meh cikgubeydah pesan.
Sentiasa ingat Allah. Sentiasa minta kpd Allah. Yakin Allah akan beri apa yg kita minta. Tapi awas, heh..jgn minta yg mendatangkan keburukan, nescaya azabnya amat pedih. Segala perkara yg anda lakukan itu bergantung pada niat - jika baik, baiklah jadinya..jika buruk, buruklah kesudahannya. Yakinlah, bahawa setiap yg berlaku dgn izin Allah. Jika musibah melanda, ada hikmah disebaliknya. Jika baik yg datang itulah ganjaran dari Allah. Jgnlah leka ketika kita senang, bahagia. Waktu leka itulah kita akan diturunkan dugaan.....Serahkan segala-galanya kepada Allah, kita tidak akan kerugian. Terima dgn redha, sentiasa bersyukur, Allah akan beri ganjaran berlipat ganda, ingat 1% rahmat Allah beri kepada semua manusia di muka bumi ini...kita sebenarnya berkongsi 1% ini. Yang lagi 99% rahmat, Allah akan beri di akhirat kelak.
Jagalah Allah....Allah menjagamu.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 07:38 #
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Incredible Tale..... |
D,
Just now spoke to Kiah. She told me about this person's (close to my heart) encounter with che pon. Eekz..and I'm typing this at night!!!! Niaya nyer kes!!!!!
Sekolah ini telah mengadakan Qiyamulail. Hm....kita panggil orang nie - Pe'ah. She was making her way to the loo around 9pm. Dlm kesunyian itu, dia ternampak che pon tengah dok kat tangga...eeeeeeeeekZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!! Pe'ah lari lintang-pukang. Sempat dengar che pon terbang mengejar dia. Pe'ah lari ke staffroom, kunci pintu. Dia dengar pintu dicakar......dia berbual pulak dgn che pon kat luar...something like - jgn kacau aku...or go away something like that laaa. Dia perasan ada 2 orang teacher jugak dalam staffroom..jorang tengokkan gelagat Pe'ah, tak berani bersuara...diam seribu bahasa. Agaknya mereka faham. Bila Pe'ah rasa keadaan dah eda, barulah dia buka pintu. Sekolah mana, eh? Madrasah....tapi jgn tanya aku madrasah mana......I won't say the name. So when I thought it's just an incredible tale...haa...orang yg aku sayang terjumpa makhluk ni.....nak cakap macam mana lagi????
Kiah kata, you can feel the presence bila dgn tiba-tiba saja kau rasa seram, tak tentu arah, seperti engkau diekori atau diawasi. Heh...tu aku selalu rasa. Jadi aku tanya Kiah....kalau terjadi pada kita, camner? Hai....nak lari tak larat...pakai nampak, serah diri laaaaa!!!!!! Sempat Kiah ketawa.......I hope I don't get to experience this!
Teringat kata Pai....orang kat negeri Arab pun terror, tau. Bab sihir ni...jgn sebut. Dia kata, sewaktu dia belajar kat London dulu, dia & rakan-rakannya jln-jln ke kawasan castle...yg macam dlm cerita English tu.......Dia kata, masuk ajer dlm castle, bulu roma meremang dgn tiba-tiba......dia dapat rasa kehadiran yg tidak diingini...bayangkanlah tempat yg dah berzaman masih berdiri tegak!!!!!
Pai banyak cerita seram yg dia & anggota keluarganya alami. Salah satunya, tempat tinggal lama kakaknya, kebetulan Lin pulak sekarang tinggal di blok yg sama. Ia berlaku sewaktu dia mengulangkaji pelajaran dgn 2 orang rakan...tak silap utk A level. Mereka bertiga saja, konon babysit the house laaa. Exact story, aku tak ingat, tapi sikit lebih kurang gini - kecoh 3 anakdara duduk kat rumah baru ni. Dlm kekecohan itu, tiba-tiba seorang terdiam terpaku matanya di tingkap. Yg lain pun hairan, dan tengok juga....Rupanya ada makhluk melihat ke arah mereka di tingkap yg terbuka. Dia senyum...dari slightest smile to the widest grin...dari cantik ke rupa yg terlalu hodoh. And vanish thru thin air......tak silap mengilai juga.....perkara ini berlaku tengahmalam. I tell you....memang tempat tu keras. Kalau aku kat blok tu around Maghrib ke atas....sunyinya semacam.
Nak stop sekarang...takder orang temankan aku...nak masuk bilik take cover.....continue tomorrow....
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 22:14 #
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Musibah Melanda |
D,
Terharu melihat & membaca tentang musibah yg melanda Indonesia. Beberapa hari yg lalu, aku sibuk mengulangkaji dgn anak-anak tentang matapelajaran Akidah...terlintas hati bila terbaca akan kemungkaran Allah. Allah akan turunkan bencana. Tup..tup...musibah melanda negara jiran. Kita di sini sibuk dgn GSS...holiday, bayangkanlah jika musibah melanda kota Singa ini. Mana kita nak sembunyi, sejauh mana kita boleh lari...? Pusing-pusing situ juga.....
Minggu lalu, sempat berbual panjang dgn Nana. Bertahun tak jumpa, bertahun tak dengar berita. Namun bila dah berbual....kecoh....Aku faham akan kerjayanya. Dia adalah seorang yg fokus, no nonsense with her timing...semuanya mesti terurus...Perfectionist. Aku akur akan gaya dia mengatur hidupnya, jadi dia terharu juga bila aku minta izin darinya luangkan beberapa minit utk ku.That half an hour tele-conversation was enough to bond us again....to pick up where we left. Alhamdulillah.
The weekend was well spent...we stayed at home most of the time. Visited mil - courtesy call, aunt Normah to collect some outfits for our trip. Aunt Normah & family are regular visitors to that region. This year they had to change their travel plans..otherwise we could've been travelling together. But it's an advantage, we borrowed most of their stuff. Alhamdulillah.
Watched White Chicks with the boys over the weekend...It was so hilarious!!! I'm gonna watch it again before we return to Video Ezy. Looking at my itinerary, I wish I could have more time to plan this trip. I wish we have more time there....looks like, some plans must be cancelled. Unless, I make excuse like flight's full, so we've to stay a few days more..hehehehehe...!!!!!! I've already told him, if he makes any blunder, we all get to stay 1 extra day there..heh!!!! I guess he can't wait to have this break. He told his boss he needed a break. He wants to be with his family, his staff can cover the necessary protocols. I'm glad that he's into this trip, too. Yeah, he's as excited as I am. Alhamdulillah.
Anak-anak sedang menghitung hari.......
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 08:42 #
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It has begun..... |
D,
Just like announced in Mortal Kombat...."It has begun!"
The school holidays started yesterday for Han & Hin. Now, we realised just how excited they are. They told everybody in the world - the tutor, the school teachers. Fidel & I were in for a shock, but how can we contain their excitement? Now, I've to pull them back on the ground - madrasah exam isn't over yet.
What the heck, I'm as excited as they are - brainstorming the itinerary, the budget. These things happen when you don't plan in advance, otherwise we could've saved so much during the NATAS Fair. But then again, it's more fun when it's last minute. The adrenaline rush is good for me, heh.
Back to my new project........
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 06:26 #
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A Blessing...in disguise?? |
D,
It doesn't really matter, because it's really how Allah does things. Don't ask...accept with Alhamdulillahirabbil 'alamin......
Alhamdulillah....the message got across. I'm so happy for my boys. I'm looking forward to a good R & R. He's quite excited, too....InsyaAllah let's pray everything goes well. Now I've to check the karchingz-karchingz.....erm, 1 ribu dirham cukup tak eh??? Kalo tak, satu persatu kene lelong!!!!
Thank you, Allah....thank you, Allah.....thank you, Allah.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 12:18 #
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Roh.....perasaan |
D,
Last Saturday, the class was held at musollah. Kesian aku, dok sowang-sowang kat sempasan masjid. Pulak tuh, tak dengar suara ustz. Aku jumpa Busu, told her about my plight. Alhamdulillah......she increase the speaker volume, bukak sempadan so that aku dapat nampak ustz. Ustz pun kesian kat aku......sempat lak usik, "haa...dok kat blakang tuh, jgn makan kacang, eh!!!"
Panjang sungguh kisah roh. Belum ada mood nak recap as there's so much to re-read. Had lunch with Kiah, Jeynab, Petom. I felt bad that my experience put Jeynab in pain & sadness. I was quite taken aback she feels what I'm going through although I fight very hard to bury them all. She knows that I know that she knows. And I kow that she knows that I know.....make sense???
Terapi rohani itu memang amat aku perlukan. Alhamdulillah. Rupanya ia mempersiapkan diriku utk terus tabah menghadapi ujian. Betul bak kata Jeynab. Ibaratnya seluruh tubuh ku merengkok "curling up".....words can't describe. Namun aku sering ingatkan diriku, 1 hari di Neraka ibaratnya 70 tahun waktu dunia (lebih kurang begitulah, tak ingat). Jadi aku sering ketakutan...takut yg aku ini munafik, takut segala amalan ku tak diterima Allah, takut jika para ulama', Rasul, Allah tak ingin memandang ku. Aku takut aku dlm kerugian di alam kubur & di akhirat kelak.
Namanya manusia, I still need validation....I don't why.....ternyata aku masih lemah. Masih membiarkan nafsu mengawal ku. Aku ingin keluar dari belenggu ini...mungkinkah death is the only way out? Aku tidak tahu akan kesudahan cerita ku...samada akan mendapat kebahgiaan sejati di alam barzakh & akhirat? Bak kata orang - ditelan mati mak, dibuang mati bapak.
Mana lightbulb moments...?
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 11:10 #
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Project Run Away.... |
D,
Tinggal projek baju dah gosok dgn baju lom gosok....haiz haiz haiz.......and the bilik pengantin tuer!!!!!
Transit sekejap kat blog....
I watched Dewi 2 nights ago. I've missed so many episodes. Fate.....it was truly inspirational to watch Dr Martha Tilaar. Nasihatnya kepada wanita - puasa Isnin & Khamis pasti innerbeauty akan menyerlah...iman akan menyerikan air muka wanita. She's almost 70 & she's looking so good!!!!!I guess sebelum Oprah...sudah ada ikon daerah Asia Tenggara seperti Dr Martha Tilaar, Ibu Moeryati (Mustika Ratu), Sarimah, Puan Aishah (wife to former President Yusuf Ishak)....to name a few.
Okies...back to tafsir Maaliki Yawmiddin - yg memiliki hari pembalasan.
-Di antara Rukun Iman, 2 perkara pokok kepercayaan yg menonjol adalah kepercayaan dgn Allah & kepercayaan dgn kehidupan di Akhirat. Hadis Shahih, riwayat Bukhari, Muslim & lain lain, "Barangsiapa yg beriman dgn Allah & hari Akhirat hendaklah berlaku baik terhadap tetangganya, & barangsiapa yg beriman dgn Allah & hari Akhirat hendaklah memuliakan akan tamunya & barangsiapa yg beriman dgn Allah & hari Akhirat hendaklah berkata yg baik atau diam."
-Akhirat adalah penghidupan yg jauh lebih penting dari penghidupan di dunia sekarang ini. Bukan saja dikatakan lebih penting, tetapi juga lebih lama, lebih besar, lebih jelek bagi org-org kafir atau jahat.
-Kehidupan di dunia ini adalah kehidupan yg amat kecil ertinya, amat sedikit rendah & amat terbatas waktunya. Penghidupan di dunia ini adalah ibarat setitis air sedang penghidupan di Akhirat nanti adalah ibarat samudera luas.
"Penghidupan dunia ini hanya permainan & mainan, sedang kehidupan di Akhirat adalah lebih baik bagi org-org yg taqwa. Apakan kamu mau memikirkannya." Al An'am 32.
-Sekiranya seluruh alam ini dikatakan menakjubkan & menghairankan, maka manusialah yg paling menakjubkan & menghairankan. Dan yg paling menakjubkan & menghairankan pada manusia bukanlah jasmani atau tubuhnya, tetapi adalah rohaninya.
-Rohani manusia bukan berasal dari tanah, bukan benda tetapi sesuatu yg amat ghaib yg diciptakan Allah yg hanya Allah saja yg mengetahuinya. Pernah org-org Yahudi bertanya dpd Rasulullah saw tentang roh, Baginda sendiri tidak dapat menjawabnya. Lalu diturunkan wahyu,
"Mereka bertanya kpd engkau tentang roh. Katakanlah : Roh itu adalah urusan(rahsia) Tuhanku. Dan tidaklah diberikan ilmu pengetahuan kpd mu kecuali sedikit saja." Al Isra' 85.
-Manusia dikatakan makhluk yg tertinggi kerana rohaninya, kerana jiwanya, akalnya, hatinya & nafsunya. Dan kerana jiwa, akal, hati & nafsunya itu pulalah manusia dapat jatuh menjadi makhluk yg terendah, yg paling hina atau jahat.
Surah At Tin 4-6 :
Sungguh-sungguh Kami telah ciptakan manusia dlm sebaik-baik kejadian.
Kemudian Kami jatuhkan dia menjadi serendah-rendah makhluk.
Kecuali org-org yg beriman & beramal shalih, bagi mereka ganjaran yg tidak putus-putus.
-Tubuh manusia dgn semua bahagian-bahagiannya adalah barang mati, tidak dapat bergerak, merasa,melihat,mendengar. Kerana adanya roh yg bertempat di dlm tubuh manusia itulah manusia dapat hidup, bergerak, merasa, melihat, mendengar, mengerti & dapat memahamkan segala sesuatu.
-Kalau roh tidak ada atau sudah keluar dari tubuh, maka tubuh manusia tidak dapat berbuat apa-apa lagi. Lama-lama menjadi busuk sehingga perlu dikuburkan, kemudian hancur menjadi tanah.
-Kerana roh menyebabkan kita hidup, maka roh itu tidak dapat mati. Roh kekal & abadi. Hanya tubuh yg hancur & rosak.
Sebagai ringkasan.....kami diingatkan melalui ayat Al Quran surah As-Sajdah 11-12,
"Katakanlah, kamu akan diwafatkan oleh Malaikat Maut yg ditugaskan utk itu, kemudian kamu akan dikembalikan kpd Tuhanmu.
"Alangkah hebatnya sekiranya engkau melihat ketika org-org yg durhaka itu menundukkan kepala mereka di hadapan Tuhan mereka sambil mengeluh : Ya Tuhan kami, kami sudah melihat & mendegnar maka kembalikanlah kami ke dunia, niscaya kami akan mengerjakan kebaikan, sesungguhnya kami sekarang sudah yakin."
Surah Az-Zumar 58-59
"Jgn sampai ada yg mengeluh keitka melihat siksa dgn berkata : Alangkah baiknya sekiranya aku kembali hidup di duni,maka aku pasti berbuat baik saja.
Tidak mungkin engkau akan kembali hidup di dunia, sebab selama engkau di duni sudah sampai kpdmu ayat-ayatKu, lalu engkau menyombongkan diri, & engkau tetap menolaknya."
-Utk menghidarkan diri dari sesalan yg berpanjangan itu, ingatlah seruan Allah dlm Az-Zumar ayat 54-55,
"Dan kembalilah kpd Tuhanmu, & berserah dirilah kpdNya sebelum datang kpdmu azab itu, kemudian kamu tidak dapat ditolong lagi.
Turutlah sebaik-baiknya (agama) yg diturnkan kpdmu dari Tuhan kamu, sebelum datang kpdmu azab dgn tiba-tiba sedang kamu tidak sadar (dlm keadaan lengah,tiba-tiba mati)."
Wallahualam bissawab.
I end today's entry with some phrases from Cambuk Hati by Dr Aidh Al Qarni :
"Barangsiapa yg merasa malu kpd Allah dlm ketaatannya, Allah akan merasa malu kpdnya saat ia berbuat dosa."
"Malam itu panjang, maka jgnlah engkau memendekkannya dgn tidurmy. Siang itu bersih, maka jgnlah engkau mencemarinya dgn dosa-dosamu."
"Hai org yg sangat bodoh lagi sangat lalai, seandainya engkau mendengar jeritan suara qalam saat bergerak di loh Mahfuzh menulis takdirmu, niscaya kamu akan mati kaget."
"Barangsiapa yg berkhianat terhadap Allah, dgn diam-diam, Dia akan membuka rahsianya dgn terang-terangan."
My umrah 2005 photos are in my Fotopages.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 16:03 #
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Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, Laa Ilaa Ha Illallah AllahuAkbar |
I love you, Allah,
Thank you, Allah.
D,
Iz passed his PSLE madrasah....Syukur.....tak hilang senyuman di bibir mommy!!!! Yg membanggakan, dia lulus dgn berkat usahanya sendiri..sendirian berhad..Alhamdulillah, anak ku. Although anak Kiah lagi power....aku bersyukur dgn rezeki ini utk anak ku. Next round....Id. InsyaAllah, mudah-mudahan dia akan lulus juga.
Han & Hin got their results for SA1....Alhamdulillah. Within 1 month of tuition, they've shown a lot of improvement - besides guidance from their daddy before he left for overseas assignment. Kudos to teacher Yaya, she's so dedicated to the students. Inilah keberkahan orang yg ikhlas mengajar. My boys attend group tuition, quite a large group. But somehow, through my obeservation, she has individual time for each child. Her methods are interesting. I hear compliments about her. It's not easy to get into her class, but Alhamdulillah I managed to squeeze my 2 boys & they seem to be doing well.
Now....the young dudes. I hope they get their results soon. Hopefully they make it through the next semester. I think it's high time for tuition teacher to assist them, too. I'm just glad they're not complaining about their Quran recital classes. I've transfered Id, Han & Hin to different ustazah. Although Id & Han have to go back to Qiraati, I find that this time around, their tajwid are so much better. Id's verbal expressions are clearer. I think by end of June they should be continuing to Al Baqarah where they stopped reciting. Hin is doing well, too. Yup...there is a difference when I send the children to recite surah everyday. Provided, you get a good teacher, that is. It makes a lot of diference. So when they grow older, even if they can only attend recital once a week, it's a breeze. Alhamdulillah, I see it in Iz. Even his writing in Arabic is nice. With these 3.....it's just too bad there's no emphasis in writing Arabic. Come to think of it, I'm supposed to ask teacher Yaya if her sis is still willing to accept my 4 boys for Arabic tuition..heh!!!
It's been hectic, but I find time to love myself all over again. In 2 weeks, I managed to have time with girlfriends, bond with my 4 boys alone, go for 4 sessions of massage, go for facial, manicure & pedicure.....Kak Azizah & Linda were so excited when I told them about the mani & pedi service on offer till end May. Tak jauh, kedai bawah blok ajer. I just found out Kak Azizah does lulur,too....haiz bertuah badan. Tak yah gi spa jauh-jauh. Jalan 10 minit dah boleh dapat head to toe pampering. Except, I must still visit Florence for my face. Once in 6 months pun jadi laaa nak lepaskan rindu. Ingat senang eh jadi wanita?
Must finish up my spring cleaning by today. I want to continue with Samudera Al Fatihah, get on with my project. I hope to meet up with Jeynab this weekend. Meanwhile..must have a dose of Nasi Jengganan @ Santan Berlada with Linda this morning.
Time to continue spring cleaning. Will continue my entry on kuliah soon. Must get on with my project, too. InsyaAllah.
Thanks, Leha...the Cambuk Hati helps a lot. Hati mau baik, berk!
Subhanallah Alhamdulillah Laa Ilaa Ha Illallah Allahu Akbar.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 07:58 #
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Big Heart...Small Heart |
D,
It was fate...I finally re-joined ustz Salbiah's class. Boy....I was sure so happy. The lightbulb moments were incredible...kesian ko, Tipah...you miss so much. Jgn terus syahid, yer....I missed the sholat jemaah. Aisey man...sayang seribu kali sayang, ustz bawak surah Yasiin. But, Alhamdulillah, I managed to get to bukak water bottle aku when she decided to read Yasiin again during sholat sunnat hajat. Ustz pesan....tiap kali habis baca mubin, doa.
Sambungan Samudera AlFatihah. Quote :
Ketahuilah bahawa seluruh rahmat & nikmat yg dituangkan Allah dipermukaan bumi ini adalah sebahgian kecil saja dari rahmat Allah yg amat besar.
Sabda Rasulullah - "Sesungguhnya Allah Ta'ala pada hari Ia menciptakan langit & bumi, menciptakan pula akan 100 rahmat.Masing-masingnya memenuhi ruang antara lagit & bumi. Di antara 100 rahmat tersebut dijadikan Allah hanya 1 rahmat utk di bumi ini. Dgn rahmat 1 itulah berkasih-sayang antara ibu dgn anaknya, antara binatang-binatang liar & burung-burung terhadap anak-anak masing-masing, 99 rahmat lainnya ditahan & bila sudah terjadi kiamat besar, disempurnakanNya rahmat itu."
Surah An Nisa' 77 - Katakanlah (hai Muhammad) : harta benda (kesenangan) dunia ini sedikit, & akhirat itu lebih baik bagi orang yg taqwa, di mana mereka tidak akan dianiaya (dirugikan) sekalipun sedikit."
Ertinya - seluruh rahmat, nikmat, harta benda atau kesenangan di dunia ini terbatas sekali, terbatas banyaknya & terbatas waktu kegunaannya. Tetapi rahmat atau kesenangan di akhirat itu tidak terbatas, baik jumlah begitu waktunya.
Sebodoh-bodoh manusia ialah orang yg mengorbankan kesenangan akhiratnya utk mendapatkan kesenangan di dunia ini. Mendapatkan kesenangan atau kekayaan duni a dgn jalan yg terlarang atau yg tidak halal, adalah bererti mengorbankan kesenangan akhirat utk mendapatkan kesenangan dunia yg sedikit yg fana ini.
Sabda Rasulullah - "Sejelek-jelek kedudukan manusia pada sisi Allah di hari kiamat ialah seorang yg mengorbankan akhiratnya utk dunia lainnya."
Will write more on tafsir ayat Maaliki Yawmiddin later. Panjang ah beb. Aku kene recap betul-betul. Untung aku laa semalam.....ustz bawa belacan & ikan kering Sarawak...habis aku borong. Belacan dia, mak oi...! sehingga menjilat jari!!! Buat smabal belacan, power!!! Apakan tidak....freshly made, udang naik dari laut ajer, orang terus buat belacan. Must kasi bapak...dia pandai buat sambal belacan, aku ponG kalah!!!
Since it's still Hari Ibu, ustz persembahkan nasyid.....the songs were really menusuk kalbu. My favourite is this song....original melody was from J Mizan. Ustz ubah liriknya sedikit. Dia tujukan utk kita semua sebab dia teringatkan kita ketika dia jauh di Seratuk, Sarawak. Tears fell from her eyes.....when she & her group sang this one....
Kalau Ku Bayangkan (originaklly by J Mizan)
Ustazah Salbiah's Version
Kalau ku bayangkan
Dirimu jauh dariku
Betapa sunyinya tentu tidak
Seharum dulu
Engkau ku bayangkan
Bermukim di dlm jiwa
Tapi ku terlupa
Insan mudah terlupa
Kini ku bayangkan
Seandainya kita bersama
Terangilah duniaku
Bersinar bintangmu
Marilah dewi ku
Marilah kita bersama
Tak akan berdosa
Insan yg berjemaah.......
Jap eh...nak lap airmata........
Made plans to meet Kiah @ Parkway. Bertahun dia tak masuk Parkway...aku jadi tourist guide dia. We had late lunch @ hawker centre.....makan kway teow kuah Hass Bawa. Bebudakz punya laa excited mited jumpa the baba actor.....finally, Id braved himself to ask, "excuse me, are you the actor?".......aku terpaksa apologise to him...."I'm sorry, the kids are so excited, they've been watching you since just now...& are very curious." He smiled, "it's ok". Haiz..budak-budak nie......
While they played @ EZone, Kiah & I had some time @ bijikopidaunteh. I must make a point to meet up with Jeynab, only Kiah yg berani jumpa Jeynab. Not that I don't want to meet Jeynab...but bila aku fikirkan masalah aku...bila nak game...? So I won't make anymore excuses....InsyaAllah.
I must say....I'm celebrating Mother's Day. The time I had with my boys, Kiah & her son was a memorable one. Simple pleasures. Kiah had double celebration...her son did very well in PSLE madrasah. Iz will only know later, plus today is the beginning of madrasah midyear exam.
He's probably flying from one continent to another now......he called last night from New York.....soon he'll be reaching Bonn. Semoga Allah sentiasa bersamanya. Aku sering diingatkan...dunia ini sementara, akhirat itu kekal. Kehidupan, suka-duka wanita adalah ganjaran. Jika mendapat kesusahan, akan dapat kebaikan di akhirat.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 08:14 #
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Share...... |
D,
Met up with Kiah & AZ yesterday...finally! And finally received berfday card from InanG....posnita che' Kiah nie......lambat, macam naik kapal, turun kapal. Thanks for the card, InanG....thanks for that cute lil' thing. Reminds me of the time we celebrated my berfday donkey years ago.....Dunkin Donuts @ Goldhill Square, Strawberry Shortcake shop......watched movie.....
AZ was so pissed off with the latest update...heh, cute tengok dia ngamok - all the ten fingers sumer kluar. The best part, Kiah ponG used the word baruah....then she went, "baruah tuh aper???" Makdikao...lepakz golek-golek aku dibuatnyer!!!!! We couldn't resist the smell of Famous Amos. We had a pack each for dessert.
Still feeling so sick....I need to make appointment with Mak Haji Leha, she's only free next week. She said, "ngandong tak?".....ish..selisih selusuh!!!! choy!!!!! I really need to go thru detoxification with her, so Monday, it will be, InsyaAllah.
Meantime, went to Kak Azizah for 2nd time...serah diri sey!!! Pelik jugak akak, I told her I prefer go thru the massage 3 times. Alhamdulillah, the urat saraf dah tak sedegil 2 days ago. This time around, order ubat periuk dgn dia. She was interested with the bukhr thingy, she bought a few & looks forward to the next shipment.
I need to relax....perhaps end the day with a cup of lavender tea.....have a good weekend, folks.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 19:15 #
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Orang Tamak Selalu Rugi, Orang Lokek Tak Pernah Untung |
D,
Bukan kerana ghairah nak mengundi.....foster dad had difficulty going up the stairs, the staff mending the polling station nak tolong dia, tapi dia nak naik tangga sendiri. Aku pun nak turun pimpin tangan dia...sekali, aku lak terjatuh. Terpelecuk, almost rolling down, aku tahan...terduduk - mak dikao!!! Kaki terpelecuk, pantat punyalah saketz!!!!! Last-last...si staff tolong aku.....bapak was very concern. Nak tolong orangtua, orang muda yg kene diangkat.
So, dah braper hari nie..kaki aku bengkak & salah urat. Worse.....mingraine tak ilang-ilang. Kak Don takder kat S'pore. Alhamdulillah, M gave me Kak Azizah's phone nbr. Dia tinggal dekat....sama blk dgn M. Bahana dia kesiankan aku, dia sanggup urut aku last night. So it was a 10 minute walk. Fuuuyuu........h, urutnya setanding Kak Don. Cuma tak lama macam Kak Don. But puas hati, beb. Harga pun berpatutan. Last night cuma warm up jerk. Gelihati Kak Azizah ketawa tengok keletah aku mengerang sakit & geli. Tak sabar dia nak kerjekan urat saraf yg dah lama tersimpul..aku rasa next round, mesti no mercy nyer!!!!! The best part of all, dia jual jamu serbuk!!!! Dia heran banget tengok aku so excited nak jamu!!!!! Selalunya orang nak pill or capsule. So, sesaper yg nak jamu, calling-calling laa gua. Aku malaz nak buat sendiri..nak gi carik nama-nama aneh tuh....dah susah nak dapat, mahal tau!!!!!
Memang betul kata pepatah - orang tamak selalu rugi. Then not sure pulak if this pepatah exist - orang lokek tak pernah untung....this phrase keep appearing dlm kepala otak aku. Alhamdulillah, aku dikelilingi oleh insan-insan yg berilmu, yg tak lokek ilmu..kadangkala insan yg aku belum kenal pun sudi berkongsi ilmu dgn aku. Subhanallah.....! Tak kisah laa, ilmu dunia ker, ilmu akhirat ker, resepi ker, cara jaga kucing ker, apa-apa laa....it's such a blessing.
Ustz selalu pesan, jgn lokek jika ada ilmu. She encouraged me to share my recipes with anyone..dia kata senang nak dapat pahala...kasi resepi dah dapat pahala. Dgn resepi itu, orang lain akan menikmatinya...bila orang itu bahagia, kita dapat pahala. Just imagine, bukan sahaja pahala kita dapat waktu masih hidup, bila dah 7 kaki dalam pun kita dapat pahala, tau! Dengan resepi itu, bila orang lain pass kepada yg lain, maka bertambah laa keberkahan pada diri kita. So never, ever, lokek. Kesian, eh....bagi mereka yg tak tahu. Ada tuh sungguh-sungguh simpan rahsia..."er, kiter tak ley kasi awak resepi nie, nie turun-temurun tau, family ajer yg tau", "family secret resepi, orang luar tak ley" "maner ley kasi, nanti orang lain tau, kiter rugi, dia yg untung"......Sesungguhnya rezeki itu dari Allah.
What if 1 hari, ada orang lebih bijaksana dari awak, resepi dia semua menjadi...anak awak suka sangat kuih yg dia buat. Then kita pun nak masakkan utk anak, atau nak sangat lah resepi tuh - nak buat jual ker, nak kasi orang utk hadiah ker.....tak terkilan or terjelih lidah nakkan sangat resepi tuh??? Baru padan muka awak. So.....jgn ingat awak akan sentiasa pijak bumi...kengkadang bumi tuh ada atas kepala awak sendiri.
Personally, aku rasa niat itu penting. Kongsilah ilmu, InsyaAllah kita akan mendapat keberkahannya di dunia & akhirat....tapi jgn kasi orang ilmu songsang lak!!!!!! Dosa, beb!!!! Nanti jatuh ke tempat paling bawahhhhhhh sekali!
Thanks for the knowledge.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 08:46 #
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Another Lemau Session |
D,
The ordeal has made me so lemau. Migraine nie tak ilang-ilang. My innervoice is telling me to do something...but I still can't figure out, it just said - do something about it.... - eh, but do what???
I received sms from her yesterday......do I take it as blessing in disguise? I called her immediately & cried...I asked her what happened.. She said, we're ok.....we're ok. Like I said before, aku tak akan serik. Semuanya berlaku dgn izin Allah. Aku yakin ada rahmat di sebalik ini semua.
Hm....lapar, I've not been eating well. Perhaps later nak gi Maslina Deli. Hm...nak beli jongkong in the mangkuk, koswe, pulut panggang, aku rasa aku nak beli semua dlm kedai tuh!!! Ish..tamak macam cookie monster pulak!!!!
Boring ah...nak sangat minum hot cocoa, tapi tengah migraine...haiz kene puasa cocoa laa aku nie! I think that's what my innervoice is telling me.......I need a dose of hot cocoa!!!!!
Just the other day, I read emails sent by Ayu & Nah. Alhamdulillah, the messages lifted my spirits. I'm so touched, Ayu. Tak sangka Ayu simpan nasihat kakak. Kakak doakan Ayu terus maju. Jgn sia-siakan tunjuk-ajar ibu mu, adik. I'm very sure you can go far with the skills that you have. You are so lucky. True, keikhlasan membawa keberkahan. Alhamdulillah.
Nah sent a lovely email about girlfriends. It reminds me of the bond I have with all of them. We come from different backgrounds...tapi naluri wanita tetap sama. Alhamdulillah, Allah himpunkan aku dgn girlfriends yg membawaku ke arah kebaikan.
Aku sedar, ramai juga girlfriends yg sudah lama aku tak keep in touch with. I feel bad, but I still think of them....seperti my blog pals. I miss the time we shared..gi lunch or dinner together kat Toa Payoh, Arab St, share info on cats, gi JB..yg ada tuh...sampai sekarang lom jumper for lunch or dinner date. Perhaps the 2nd term holidays I'll be able to meet them up again. Sekejap pun tak apa,asal dapat lepas rindu.
Yeh.......dah dapat cd gambar umrah tahun lalu!!! Alhamdulillah. I shall put in Kodak Gallery, kalo korang nak tengok, biasala heh....sign in dulu yer. Registration free. Okies..korang tunggu jap..aku gi load gambarz tuh......
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 07:28 #
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Gunung Merapi Berapi |
D,
It was quite a huge explosion....Allah sahaja yg tahu. Erm..tak besar sangat aah...entah maner, kiter masih ley handle Alhamdulillah. Mungkin keberkahan membaca ayat-ayat itu, so I guess when it's needed it's there to help me out. At the end of it...sampai skrang kepala aku bengang!!! Mee-gra-in bangetz aku dibuatnyer. Sorry eh Leha, aku baru terbaca sms ko...Aku knocked out abiz!!!!
Tipah kata...kalo aku, aku akan rasa sungguhkesunyian.com.....terlalu keseorangan...yes, itulah yg aku lalui sekarang...tapikan Tipah, masok kubor ponG sowang-sowang kan??? So take it as.....preparation nak masok kubor laa. Tapikan yg nak buat baik nyer part tu laa kengkadang menghunus jiwangz!!!!
Kiah tak ikot aku gi rumah member skolah. Aiseyman.....anjat Beydah...cantik rumah member. Gua respeck sama lu aah!!! Betol aku tabik. She's doing well....for a woman my age, she looks so fine. From her, aku terima nasihat yg bernas.....ada betol jugak cakap dia. Asset......macam insurance...makin kiter simpan, makin mature....makin menambahkan hasil,kan? Tapi kene tengok apa yg kiter simpan laa.....kalo yg tak mendatangkan hasil gi buang macam besi burok suak!!!!!
Kiah kejutkan aku ajak bual.....dia setuju cakap member.....tapi sekarang aku penat, very penat.....macam all the energy dah spent. Nak kene pulihkan semula semangat. It's not easy. Aku rasa macam nak letak noktah dan tanda seru dlm hal nie.
I love you, Allah.
Thank you, Allah.
...but I need You to heal me. Suddenly I'm stuck in the gallows. Show the the light....
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 08:33 #
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Leka bangetz..... |
D,
I've been very busy....yer laa...tak abiz-abiz dgn kesibukan. Tapi hati puas. Tak sabar nak tunjuk members hasil kerjatangan Linda, aku & Kiah..er.....tapi dia tengah lemau skrang...but I'm sure she wouldn't mind doing this sideline. I've asked Ina, another ngaji member to showcase her skills, too. Maybe Nadia would like to join, too. InsyaAllah. Thanks, Rasberry. No hurry, don't worry. That'll give me time to design & make more.....
Saturday :
He was kind enough to accompany me to Textile Centre & Arab St as I wanted to get my stuff for my beadings. The boys followed & did some revision in the car. I'm thankful that he's supporting me. It's time that jumpstart my life all over again after taking a backseat for so long. He realised that this time, it's for sure....where got time for hangat-hangat tahi ayam, kan? Let this thing take off on the sideline, then InsyaAllah, I want to take up Montessori course.
Not feeling well lately. Finally, the flu bug has hit me. I was so pleasantly surprised when ustz ngaji called. Rindu bangetz aku dgn dia. She came down coz her FIL wasn't well. Her dd is doing well in Aussie, while the rest of the family has started a new life in another part of the world. She woke me up on Saturday night, but I was so groggy. She called the next morning, I jumped at the idea of meeting her & her friends that night.
Sunday :
Alhamdulillah, he's been spending whatever time he has with me...with us. He's been so busy lately, the boys kept asking for him. Life has never been fair, but we get along. This is our lifestyle, he's never here when the boys sit for exams, when the boys have long breaks - we make do with whatever time we have & spend it well. Like I said before, perhaps Allah wants us to be prepared to face life ahead - so that kiter tak terperanjat berok agaknyer....jgn bergantung kpd manusia kerana manusia sentiasa mengecewakan manusia sekelilingnya & dirinya sendiri. Serahkan segala-galanya kpd Allah yg satu, nescaya kita tidak akan kecewa & dipersia-siakan.
The boys had intensive session of revision with him. He's prepared them well for their exams as he'll be away for quite a while. He & I squeezed some time for jogging & brisk walking in the late afternoon. Fetched the boys for dinner. I've been wanting to try Bagus Yong Taufu beside the orphanage. It was good. We like the fresh noodles quite cheap & very filling.
Ustz called, appointment has been changed. Rushed home, got ready, left the boys & dad for more revision & finally met her after Maghrib. I was jumping with excitement when the blue beetle horned. We went to East Coast as they had their dinner...it was jam-packed. Then the 5 of us chose a spot near the beach & "women's empowerment" kicked off. I heard that they stayed up till 3am the night before. It was a good discussion - dari sudut duniawi (saikologi) & sudut ukhrawi. It's meant to support each other as we shared our problems & voiced out our views. Yes, it felt good. Dah lama tak dengar hujah ustz, I really miss her. I was encouraged to do the therapy...gosh..this means heavy sessions of crying...buckets full of tears. But I'm given time to think about it. They all assured me it'll be a good process for me. We all need this at one point of our lives. The husbands had been buzzing us...asking what time we would return home, where we were, with whom......haiz......men...so forgetful!!!!
So we left the beach slightly after 1 am. We promised to do this again & we vowed biar pecah di perut jgn pecah di mulut - it ended there. It wasn't all serious...it was damn cute & funny having girlfriends, 1 who is younger, 2 who are older.....1 who is way older than me. Alhamdulillah.
May Day...May Day :
Off to NTUC Tampines Mall. I love going to supermarkets in the morning. I love going to pasar Geylang as early as 0600hrs. Just a habit to avoid crowds. He & I had brunch @ QiJi, my fave where they serve SoonKueh & CheeCheongFun. We recalled the times we made trips to Far East Plaza for Chinese Muslim Noodles, I would always order these 2 delicacies & would frown if they were sold out. The rest of the day was spent at home, springcleaning a bit, revision & receiving guests. Aunt Ley, brought her granddaughter, Aleesha. Now, it's time to adore our cousins' babies. Our bottlefeeding, diaper changing, sleepless nights phases are so over. We coo, make them cry & give back to their parents...cruel.....so cruel, heh!
Met up with Leha. Told her about the 2 dreams I had. The latter is still haunting me. It's a sign for me to be prepared. Perhaps it's the doa, tak?
"Allahumma inni as aluka min fuj atil khairi wa a'udzubika min fuj atisy syarri"
Ya Allah sesungguhnya aku memohon kpd Mu suatu kebaikan yg datangnya secara tiba-tiba & aku berlindung kpd Mu dari suatu keburukan yg datangnya secara tiba-tiba.
Wallahualam.
Finally, my favourite book dlm genggaman. Dah boleh buat ulasan & share with para Cyberibu. We've started a book club..ala Oprah gitu laa. Alhamdulillah, ramai juga yg dah baca tulisan Dr Aidh Al Qarni. Laa Tahzan, Cambuk Hati, and of course...Tips Menjadi Wanita Paling Bahagia Di Dunia. It'll be my 5th time reading it, I think. I love it so much. I encourage all the women out there to keep this book, you'll never get tired reading it. Thanks again to Ustazah Salbiah.
Berfday ku dah berlalu....dah tuer-tuer gini, kiter tak suker sarprize-sarprize. So, aku bilang Kiah & AZ aku nak buku as berfday prezen....abih jorang tanyer, aku tak mintak! In my list...aku nak - Laa Tahzan (sebab aku pinjam Aunt Ley nyer buku), Cambuk Hati, Jagalah Allah Allah Menjaga Mu, AlQuran Berjalan/Bergerak.
I leave you with this.....
Pelita - Sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan pasti ada kemudahan (Al Insyirah 94:6)
Bekal - Esok hari...akan tercium semerbak harumnya bunga. Kesedihan pasti hilang & kesenangan pasti datang.
I love you Allah.
Thank you, Allah.
For my sisters in Islam.
(P.S. - Tipah, puas hati ko? Aku update berjela-jela.....nah ko, amek!!!)kwang,kwang,kwang.......
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 07:08 #
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PINKIE HEARS |
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PINKIE SHARES |
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I'tiraf
Wahai Tuhan
Ku tak layak
Ke SyurgaMu
Namun tak pula
Aku sanggup
Ke NerakaMu
Ampunkan dosaku
Terimalah taubatku
Sesungguhnya
Engkaulah Pengampun
Dosa-dosa besar
Dosa-dosaku
Bagaikan pepasir
Di pantai
Dengan rahmatMu
Ampunkan daku
Oh Tuhanku
Wahai Tuhan
Selamatkan kami ini
Dari segala
Kejahatan & kecelakaan
Kami takut
Kami harap
KepadaMu
Suburkanlah
Cinta kami
Kepada Mu
Kamilah hamba
Yg mengharap
Belas dariMU
Penantian By Harmoni
Berapa lama mesti ku nanti
Sinar cahaya mata mu
Gemerlap bagai bintang
Menghiasi malam
Malam yg menutup diriku
Berapa lama perlu ku tunggu
Lontaran suara dari bibirmu
Memecah hening taman
Taman syurgawi
Pada sebuah hati yg sepi
Penantian suatu siksa
Yg tidak tertanggung
Oleh tubuh ku yg kering & layu
Kepastian suatu penwar
Dlm suka & duka
Yg meniti hidup ku
Doa By Harmoni
Tuhan ku
Dlm termangu
Ku sebut nama Mu
Biar susah sungguh
Mengingat Mu penuh seluruh
Tuhan ku
Cahaya Mu
Panas suci bagai kerdip lilin
Di kelam sunyi
Tuhan ku
Aku hilang bentuk
Kembara di negeri asing
Tuhan ku
Pintu Mu ku ketuk
Aku tak bisa berpaling
Nasyid By Hidayah
Kepada Mu Ilahi
Yg Maha Agung Yg Maha Suci
Ku pohon perlindungan
Dan keampunanMu
Pada setiap sholat
Ku lafazkan doa & pujian
Kukuhkanlah taqwaku & keimanan
Semoga diriku diselamatkan
Dari segala bencana
Limpahilah diriku dgn sinar penuh kemuliaan
Agar tidak digoda syaitan
Yg sungguh durjana peruntuh akhlak
Inilah doa seorang insan
Mohon perlindungan
The Reason
Hoobastank
The Reason
I'm not a perfect person
There are many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
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