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Al Fateha for Zainab Jamaludin |
To my dear friends,
Thank you so much for the comforting words through the tagboard & sms. I'm sorry for not replying. I appreciate your kind thoughts & thank you for visiting.
Dear D,
I'm trying to go back to my normal routine. I should be mourning for her. But there's 1001 things to do. I don't know where to start. I'm at a loss. I feel empty....
Al Fateha for my foster mom Zainab Jamaludin. Semoga Allah mengampuni segala dosa-dosanya, menjauhinya dari azab siksa kubur & azab api neraka, melapangkan kuburnya, menempatkannya di Syurga. Rabbirghfirli waliwalidaya warhamhumma kama rabbayani saghira. Amin.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 13:41 #
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Hair same black, heart different-different....kekekeke |
Dear D,
I'm getting old, too old for modern thinking. Masuklah aku dlm kategori...apa tu, kuno....benut..?
Mungkin ini dinamakan the mid-thirties crisis/dilema? Mungkin ini adalah salah satu punca utk lebih cenderung utk menyiapkan diri utk alam barzakh & akhirat? Kuat sungguh dugaan apabila kita sudah tahu di antara benar & salah, halal & haram....kemudian mendapat tentangan dari orang kita sendiri....sesungguhnya cabaran manusia ini sedahsyat godaan syaitan.
Jadi aku di dlm persimpangan...samada utk berdiam diri atau menyuarakan pendapat & berkongsi ilmu. Kalau tak tegur, ni kira kubur aku kan? Tanggungjawab ku utk saling mengingati. Tapi kalau cakap, orang tak terima, kemudian timbul kemarahan & kecil hati....jadi dosa jugak aku....
Hm.....I think I'll let it be. Although this is my space to say what I want, I'm keeping my thoughts to myself now. This way, I won't stir any uncomfortable feelings of other human beings.
I'm taking a break. Good bye.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 07:24 #
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Glutton's Weekend Acitivity |
Dear D,
Yup, the house is still a wreck. I knew mil was coming for sleepover on Friday night, but aiyah...no need to impress her laaa.....She's not the old fashioned mil. Eeeks...I did it again. I was in lala land when she came, Fidel had to change the sheets in the boys' room. Luckily, I woke up early to greet her during the Fajr prayers.
Saturday - morning was filled with updates, she, helping out sewing the Scout badges on the boys' uniform. After sending the boys to the madrasah, we went to Hyatt to meet aunt Ley, uncle Rahman & cousin Sabreena for teatime treat @ The Cafe. We like the spread & the atmosphere. I guess this will be our next hangout place. It was a wonderful chat & eat session, especially small gathering like this. I know aunt Ley & uncle Rahman love this kind of family gathering. Of course I love being with them as they're the closest to us since Fidel & I were courting.
The menu, let see....ah...that sinful chocolate in the large bowl, sushi, sago gula melaka, soon kueh, that sinful chocolate again....I tell you this thing makes me forget about sex!!!!! It's way.....way.....way.......so much better than sex!!!! After 2 hours stuffing ourselves, we left the restaurant. It was an extremely slow walk for me, the worst part, I had to climb up the stairs to go to the carpark...what a long journey!kekekeke....
Off to fetch the boys & zoomed to Parkway Parade, coincidentally met with youngest sil. We were on birthday gift hunt for 2nd sil & her son. Dinner at McD for the boys.
Sunday - Sent Id & Han for soccer. Back to the old routine of breakfast at the small road behind Kembangan mrt station. We had laksa, nasi lemak & lemang set. MIL made her way to the mosque while Fidel & I went to visit foster mom. Off to visit foster dad & he wanted to give us another lunch treat. So picked the boys up & headed to Hjh Maimunah @ Geylang. And when we thought that was the end of our makan session, I realised I've oredered 3 packets of Nasi Briyani from a charity organization to be delivered for dinner!!!!!!
Please don't remind me of my PROJEK KURUS..aaaaaa!!!!!!!!!
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 07:46 #
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erm....erm....erm.... |
Dear D,
erm.....erm...erm.....how's that for update?? kekekekeke!!!!!!!!
Have a great weekend everyone.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 16:49 #
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Antara Keropok & Nilai Persahabatan..... |
D,
Y menceritakan ustazah pernah kata, sedangkan suami-isteri bercerai kerana perkara kecil....sebabnya, ubat gigi!!!! Kelakar, kan? Kalau orang tanya, awak cerai pasal apa? Ah? ubat gigi??!!?? Semata-mata sang suami picit ubat gigi tu asal boleh ajer...dia kekadang picit di atas, tengah, bawah.....lerr.......
Inilah kes yg aku hadapi sekarang...seorang kawan merajuk & marah benar dgn ku. Jadi Y tanya aku...jadi kau selisih faham pasal keropok??!!??.....ish, ish, ish... Aku, eh kelakar kan, takder citer lain ker nak digaduhkan?? Keropok pong ley jadi bahan gaduh.. Yerr laa...kiter ingatkan bebudakz saja yg gaduh tentang remeh-temeh, haa!!! sekarang owang tuer lak tak tegur-sapa pasal.....KEROPOK!!!!! Hmm....sanggup ker aku tak berkomunikasi semata-mata disebabkan keropok tu?
Baik aku singkap semula apa yg menyebabkan perselisihan ini. R belikan keropok lekor ketika bercuti. Almaklum...keropok lekor tak tahan lama. R tahu aku gemar bender nie. Jadi bila R pergi kerja, dia keletihan & kata nak bawak bender tu, berat. Lagipun belum tentu boleh jumper kiter waktu makan. Tak per...janji kiter ley jumper aku dah hepi. Hari berganti minggu.....masih lom rezeki nak makan bender nie. Minggu lalu dia sms...nak jumper Monday (budak cuti)? Aku, tak ley (bos cuti). R, Tuesday? Aku, ader reading program...tapi ley makan lagi ker? R, tu aa aku takot nanti kang tak ley makan lagi, wasted...aku baru goreng nie..aku siram air panas dulu, then aku fry...orite. Sket lebih kurang, gitulah kita communicate.
Hari Isnin - Y sms..nak jumper tak Tuesday? Aku, aku ader reading program. Y...tak jadi ah nampaknyer. Bagi aku, kalau takder rezeki dah laa..apa nak buat. Jadi semalam, Y bilang aku bahawa mungkin sms aku dah kecikkan hati R, pasal aku sms..ley makan lagi tak bender tu? Jadi kebetulan, semalam...last minute aa nie...Y kata dia free. Aku lak tak dapat pesanan dari sekolah tentang reading program..Jadi aku pun buat keputusan aku free ah...ley jumper. Tak dapat keropok tu...jumper ajer utk lunch ok, kan? Y kata R suruh kiter 2 ajer jumpa.
Aisey, beydah....R merajuk benar dgn aku.. moral of the story...jgn fikir alat canggih nie bagoz sangat....for example... chat, email, tagging, comment, sms....paling berkesan utk komunikasi ialah bercakap dgn org berkenaan melalui talipon atau berdepan 2 pasang mata. Jadi kita tahu reaksi sebenar dlm nada suara....dgn ini tak jadi salah anggap....
R, kalau kita tak bertegur-sapa semata-mata kerana keropok lekor tu, aku minta maaf. Bukan niat aku utk menyakiti hati mu. Bukan aku tak nak keropok tu. Aku hargai ingatan kau pada aku & Y...Kalau kau simpan kan aku sampai bulan depan, pun, aku tetap terima. Aku tak nak buat andaian kenapa kau tak sempat nak kasi keropok tu pada aku, walaupun aku terfikir juga kenapa. Engkau & Allah saja yg tahu. Namun aku tak sanggup persahabatan kita longgar disebabkan hanya sebatang keropok lekor.....itukah nilai pershabatan kita? Mungkin zaman angin puting beliung aku..kau & Y dah rasakan masa kita dalam umur 20 an....Mungkin sekarang aku & Y kenalah berpaut pada dahan & ranting utk berdepan dgn zaman puting beliung kau. Aku harap...zaman puting beliung Y dah over...time belasan tahun dulu...hai jgnlah dia puting beliung zaman kiter masok kepala 4.....
Jadi aku nak rilek...aku biarkan R cool down dulu. Mungkin dia stress, ada problem. Aku harap selisih faham nie tak panjang. Bila aku fikir semula, ya laa...aku salah (eh, dah mellow betol aku nie, dulu,die-die aku betol, owang lain salah!!) Nie..mesti si Y banyak dok kat sejadah doakan aku....pasal dia selalu jadi punching bag aku. Aku doakan R sentiasa dirahmati & dlm lindungan Allah. Amin.
Aiyoh....aku nie bukan saja lemau....kecot lesut, sey......
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 05:38 #
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Berita Gembira........Sedih. |
D,
Pada mulanya aku ingin mengkhabarkan tentang majlis perjumpaan keluarga pihak Fidel hari Sabtu yg lalu. Maklumlah sudah lama kami tidak berjumpa & bermesra. Kehadiran dari pangkat moyang hingga ke cicit, sepupu, ipar-duai, bakal mempelai. Alhamdulillah.
Namun khabar sedih dengan cepatnya melenyapkan kegembiraan ku pada hari Ahad dinihari. Anak saudara kpd bapa angkat ku telah meninggal dunia. Aku & Fidel bergegas ke sana. Almarhum telah meninggalkan dunia ini di rumahnya pada 1.25pagi. Dia memang menghidap kanser usus. Aku diberitahu, sebahgian hatinya telah dibedah & dikeluarkan. Setelah selesai membacakan Surah Yasin, aku minta izin utk melihat muka almarhum. Imbasan sewaktu kami berjumpa ketika kecil hingga beberapa bulan yg lalu terbayang-bayang di fikiran.
Pemergian almarhum menyatukan semula bapak & pakcik ku. Subhanallah. Sudah bertahun mereka tidak bertegur-sapa, sebaik sahaja bapak menjejakkan kaki ke rumah almarhum, pakcik terus memeluk bapak & menangis. Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah...aku menghela nafas panjang. Aku khabarkan kpd makcik & sepupu-sepupuku yg lain, semuanya menadah tangan meng-amin-kan pertemuan itu. Ya Allah, aku teringat peristiwa di mana aku ke rumah almarhum Ati & aku ditemukan semula dgn Ina, Aton & Nani. Subhanallah. Kini hilanglah segala kerisauan ku memikirkan tentang perhubungan bapak & pakcik, inilah dikatakan air dicincang, tidak akan putus. Ya Allah, tak terhingga nikmat yg Kau turunkan kpd ku, kpd kami sekeluarga.
Kakak sepupu mengizinkan ku membantu menyelenggarakan jenazah. Subhanallah...tak ku duga dibukakan jalan utk ku pengalaman ini buat pertama kalinya. Syukur ku tak terhingga dapat membantu memandikan & mengkafankan almarhum. Salah seorang kakak seupupu walaupun ada bersama kami, tidak dapat menahan sebak sepanjang penyelenggaran tersebut. Bagi ku, sesungguhnya inilah 1 dari jalan yg Allah hendak tunjukkan ku agar aku jgn leka & sentiasa ingat kpd Nya...sentiasa jadi insan yg lebih bertaqwa selagi aku masih bernyawa.
Tibalah waktu perpisahan di rumah. Siapa tak pilu melihat 3 orang anak kecil dari usia 10 hingga 2 tahun menatap almarhum mama mereka buat kali terakhir. Hiba sungguh hati melihat anak kedua almarhum, seorang puteri menangis...dadanya turun-naik seperti ombak kuat....bagaikan boleh pecah dada anak kecil itu. Aku duduk di sisinya, memeluknya dgn sebelah tangan lalu memegang & menekan perlahan dadanya. Barulah reda tangisan puteri itu. Aku berpesan kpdnya agar sentiasa mendoakan dgn Al Fateha utk mamanya, melihatkan tubuhnya yg kecil...Dia mengangguk faham.
Sebaik sahaja jenazah diangkat utk dikebumikan, kami pulang ke pangkuan anak-anak yg kami tinggalkan. Aku bersyukur mereka dilindungi Allah & kami juga selamat sampai ke rumah dgn perlindungan Allah juga. Aku khabarkan kpd putera-putera ku tentang berita sedih dgn harapan mereka akan insaf & memberi mereka semangat agar mereka jadi anak-anak yg soleh.
Al Fateha utk Almarhum Fuadah Bte Ami. Semoga almarhum dirahmati Allah sentiasa & ditempatkan di dlm syurga. Amin.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 05:55 #
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In Memoriam.... |
Dear D,
A year ago, I blogged about her passing. I lost her, I found some back, we were lost along the way. I'm still searching for the rest. Al Fateha for Norsamawati bte Mozerin.
I read InanG's blog. I love Britney's song that I have it here in my blog. I cried as I read her entry, with the song accompanied it. I hopped over to Jung's blog. She has Christina Aguilera's song...which made me cry,too. If only we were physically standing next to each other for support.
Finally, the cat's out of the bag, so she said....JunG nak balek kampong!!!! Wow weee!!!! For 6 whole weeks!!! I almost burst the bubble...damn!!! It was so hard to keep the secret. It was quite chaotic in msn last night. We're so excited-mited, making plans to keep JunG busy for at least 4 weeks. 2 weeks later, Sja will join her, so we can't kacau daun as much as we want to.
JunG has a request. She ngidam nak gi majlis persandingan. So fellow bloggers, kalau korang ader sedara ker kengkawan ker.....dekni nyer ipar nyer sepupu buat majlis, korang pass 1 kad kat aku boley? Boley aku bawak kengkawan nie utk lepaskan ngidamnyer...almaklum she misses the togetherness of such majlis, not forgetting the food of course. Majlis utk bulan Julai, tau....jempot eh???
I'm so into Britney's song now. Part of lyrics are some of these important people in my life...some are not in the photos but are always in my mind, my heart.....
Everytime I try to fly
I fall without my wings
I feel so small
I guess I need you baby....
Above pic., Almarhum Norsamawati Mozerin standing most left.
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 09:38 #
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Tank Kiu, Cicher... |
Dear D,
Ainn came over with her lil' darling yesterday. I really appreciate her willingness to teach me. I'm really sotong when it comes to this IT stuff. So to my previous teachers - icepearlz, yati, lyana, zai.....thanks a million.
The lil' darling grows more adorable. Hai..fening lalat aku dibuatnyer..Han nie tak abiz abiz menyakat anakdara tu!!!! Once again, thanks Ainn. I'm glad you enjoyed the spread.....
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posted by pinkiecutepie # 09:32 #
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PINKIE HEARS |
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PINKIE SHARES |
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I'tiraf
Wahai Tuhan
Ku tak layak
Ke SyurgaMu
Namun tak pula
Aku sanggup
Ke NerakaMu
Ampunkan dosaku
Terimalah taubatku
Sesungguhnya
Engkaulah Pengampun
Dosa-dosa besar
Dosa-dosaku
Bagaikan pepasir
Di pantai
Dengan rahmatMu
Ampunkan daku
Oh Tuhanku
Wahai Tuhan
Selamatkan kami ini
Dari segala
Kejahatan & kecelakaan
Kami takut
Kami harap
KepadaMu
Suburkanlah
Cinta kami
Kepada Mu
Kamilah hamba
Yg mengharap
Belas dariMU
Penantian By Harmoni
Berapa lama mesti ku nanti
Sinar cahaya mata mu
Gemerlap bagai bintang
Menghiasi malam
Malam yg menutup diriku
Berapa lama perlu ku tunggu
Lontaran suara dari bibirmu
Memecah hening taman
Taman syurgawi
Pada sebuah hati yg sepi
Penantian suatu siksa
Yg tidak tertanggung
Oleh tubuh ku yg kering & layu
Kepastian suatu penwar
Dlm suka & duka
Yg meniti hidup ku
Doa By Harmoni
Tuhan ku
Dlm termangu
Ku sebut nama Mu
Biar susah sungguh
Mengingat Mu penuh seluruh
Tuhan ku
Cahaya Mu
Panas suci bagai kerdip lilin
Di kelam sunyi
Tuhan ku
Aku hilang bentuk
Kembara di negeri asing
Tuhan ku
Pintu Mu ku ketuk
Aku tak bisa berpaling
Nasyid By Hidayah
Kepada Mu Ilahi
Yg Maha Agung Yg Maha Suci
Ku pohon perlindungan
Dan keampunanMu
Pada setiap sholat
Ku lafazkan doa & pujian
Kukuhkanlah taqwaku & keimanan
Semoga diriku diselamatkan
Dari segala bencana
Limpahilah diriku dgn sinar penuh kemuliaan
Agar tidak digoda syaitan
Yg sungguh durjana peruntuh akhlak
Inilah doa seorang insan
Mohon perlindungan
The Reason
Hoobastank
The Reason
I'm not a perfect person
There are many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you
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